Martin Realey, a dedicated charity leader from Wantage, passed away at his residence on March 9. An inquest at Oxfordshire Coroner’s Court on June 30 determined that the ex-army officer and charity champion took his own life at the age of 46.
Mr. Realey, who lived with his partner Annabel England in Wantage, was supported throughout his life by his ex-wife Elaine Realey, who remained a close friend. Remembering him, Elaine Realey said, “Martin was a really caring person who went above and beyond for others.”
Originally from Newport, Isle of Wight, Martin pursued sports sciences at the University of Luton before commissioning from Sandhurst in 2000. During his military career, he served in various capacities, including as a paratrooper, intelligence officer, and completed tours in Iraq, Northern Ireland, and the Falkland Islands. He was medically discharged due to complex PTSD, which Elaine attributed to cumulative experiences during his service.
After moving to Wantage, Martin became involved with Oxfordshire mental health charity Restore as chief executive and later worked as the charity lead for SSNAP. Despite his health challenges post-military service, he was described by Elaine as a “fantastic father” who was outwardly “the life of the party” but privately battled severe depression.
Mr. Realey was renowned for his fundraising efforts, notably running the Oxford Half Marathon with a 54kg washing machine strapped to his back. This dedication to helping others left a deep impact on those who knew him. Tributes poured in following his passing, with Keri Knibbs, SSNAP’s board chair, and Andrew Baker MBE of Play2Give praising his inspirational and kind-hearted nature.
Nigel Dixey, Chairman of Grove RFC, lauded him as a “vibrant personality” while Oxford University Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust expressed gratitude for his contributions.
A funeral appeal raised over £2,130 for Support our Paras, a testament to his enduring legacy. In June, SSNAP organized a tribute event where 26 volunteers participated in a challenge inspired by Martin, running a mile each with a washing machine in his honor.
The coroner, Nicholas Graham, reported that Martin took his own life through medication overdose, with the official cause of death identified as drug toxicity.
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